New Insight On Global Warming…

I am not well-versed in the global warming discussion, but I can tell you that I am a believer in its potential to change the earth as we know it. I take a bit different slant than others though. My concern for the planet’s well-being emanates from the recognition that the Baby Boomer cohort (1946-1964) is aging and with that comes a huge number of women who will be experiencing “the change” (which is a euphemism for menopause).

I can tell you as someone who only experiences low-level warming at this point that the combined effect of full-blown hot flashes across the Boomer cohort will have a dramatic effect on the temperature of the planet…oh yes, things are going to get hot. When you couple this with the other effects we are likely to see – increased irritability and emotionality coupled with a greatly reduced patience for men generally – you can better appreciate the extent of this impending crisis. This has likely always contributed to the shorter lifespan of men, but given the sheer number of women that will be likewise afflicted at the same time (which should normalize the behavior and allow it to become more prolific) we may also see an up-tick in violence against men who attempt risky behaviors at the exact wrong time (e.g., speaking, breathing, etc.).

Perhaps a new police code will have to be developed to signal incidents that involve a menopausal woman who is in the middle of a meltdown. 10-666 is available and would at least allow for officers arriving on the scene to appreciate the magnitude of the situation. Police forces will probably need to be beefed up to deal with the increased number of incidents. Of course, if we were to start planning now we could probably build in some mitigatory actions that would help lessen the impact. Perhaps a public awareness campaign that helps inform those dealing with the menopausal when not to speak or breathe or a series of billboards and publications that show menopausal offenders looking old and haggard in orange jail jumpsuits (appeals to vanity should still be effective).

I don’t know – as I said at the outset, I am not well-versed in the global warming discussion; but, I do know that global warming is real – I have felt the beginnings of it within me and people, let me tell you, it’s gonna’ get hot in here. We need to take action now before it is too late.

Day one hundred and seventy of the new forty – obla di obla da


2 Responses

  1. abra la mente

    Thanks for placing some humor on these hot flashes, because if I don’t laugh, the alternative is not pretty!

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