I got an email from WebMD titled, “What You Need To Know About Salvia.” It caused me to immediately run through in my mind everything I already knew about saliva. I know it plays a role in digestion and has some lubrication responsibilities in regard to the mouth. I also know it is useful for licking envelopes and making spit balls. I wondered what WebMD was going to tell me about saliva that I didn’t already know. Is saliva suddenly being tied to some medical breakthrough…is there a higher use for saliva than the periodical inadvertent spraying you give others when you project it outward while talking…is drooling on pillows dangerous…what could it be??
So I opened the email and I immediately felt like Emily Litella the occasional news desk contributor (and classic Gilda Radner character) from Saturday Night Live who would rant about a topic for a few minutes before it was brought to her attention that she had confused what the actual topic was (i.e., too many violins instead of too much violence). After Emily’s error was pointed out to her she would just look back at the camera, smile and say “never mind.”
It appears that WebMD’s email was about salvia not saliva. Salvia is an herb with hallucinogenic properties that is getting an awful lot of attention lately thanks to a video of Miley Cyrus where she was allegedly smoking the stuff and acting like a fruit loop.
So – never mind.
Day five hundred and seventy-three of the new forty – obla di obla da