As I shared ever briefly earlier in the week, I have a volunteer for the husband #4 slot. My pal Scot Phelps encouraged me to share husband #4 information on my blog so my regular readers could chime in on whether he sounded like good husband material.
#4, as I will refer to him here, is a very nice man with an ideology that aligns with mine. He is handsome, funny, commited to his beliefs, gentlemanly and charming. It would appear he is the perfect husband.
But wait – there’s more (I know this sounds like an infomercial, but stick with me). He writes poetry, is intelligent, advocates for veterans’ rights, wants to change the world and is driven. Yes…looking better by the minute.
But there is still more…he is politically savvy, has a great smile and is engaged in the EM Hi Ed community. Sounds perfect right? But I have yet to share the most alluring thing about #4 – he lives in another state (a non-Midwest state).
Sure, you have heard about long distance relationships – but how about long distance husbands? What do you make of the concept that one could live in an eternal honeymoon state with a long distance husband? I think it sounds fabulous.
Indeed, I was just sharing with my favorite editor Jessica this week how well-suited I think I am to the long distance model. I don’t “need” a husband to support me; and, frankly my closet infrastructure does not allow for any additional occupants at this time (what can I say a two girl household acquires plenty of cute clothes, accessories and shoes). I do have every other weekend open for frolic and abandon while Cheyenne visits with her dad…not to mention the whole summer (which frankly is just dangerous – I should not be set free for such an extended period of time). If you look at the dynamics of my life this long distance husband model makes perfect sense.
I imagine though that all the family and friend linkages that come with marriage, all the responsibilities, all the day-to-day caring that is necessary to sustain an enduring relationship take a hit in a long distance marriage. I imagine that the “being there” even just if it is being present in the same room counts for an awful lot.
Perhaps I need to reposition my thinking about #4. Perhaps I don’t want a long distance husband, perhaps I just want to play house with a long distance playmate…ah, yes…I guess that means he needs a different number.
Day seven hundred and four of the new forty – obla di obla da