Who Needs A Ring When You Can Get A Seven Day Forecast?

Dear Lord, let me be a beacon of joy and light…or, in the alternative, let me make it through the day without killing someone while in a hormone induced rage.  Amen.

Increasingly, I think the world needs mood forecasters that are able to provide an extended forecast for folks’ moods.  Similar to weather forecasters, these mood forecasters could look at a number of information sources and provide a forecast for the week that allowed folks to plan accordingly.  The mood forecasters can examine historical data about a person, current stressors, family relationships, job expectations, etc. to compile a forecast on what the likely moods for the next week will be.

I can see it now:

Monday:  Crabby, with a chance of outbursts in the morning and early afternoon.   

Tuesday:  Toxic – be prepared to take all appropriate safety measures (in other words – HIDE).

Wednesday:  Slightly crabby, mood improving into the early evening.

Thursday:  Good-natured – prone to bouts of levity and isolated moments of gaiety.

Friday:  Growing increasingly cheery, joy increases as the day goes on.

Saturday:  Delightful – joy abounds.

Sunday:  Thoughtful and gracious in the morning and afternoon hours; increased crabbiness expected in the evening hours.

Now, wouldn’t that be helpful?  Think of the conflict and angst that could be avoided with such forecasts.  If a person was caught in the middle of a tirade because they didn’t check the forecast the blame would sit with them not the tirade-starter.  It’s all about making clear the risk at the outset and allowing people to engage based on their risk taking persona.

I have a mood ring that changes colors to indicate whether it is safe to approach me.  Unfortunately, I tend to only wear it periodically on happy days – typically during the summer.  I couldn’t wear it day-in and day-out even if I wanted to as it only cost three dollars and that means the band would eventually make my mood ring finger a mood finger by turning it green.   That would put me in a bad mood.  You would think that some entrepreneur would have already harnessed mood ring technology and moved it into a piece of fine jewelry that can be worn 24/7.  What a gift to the world that would be. But even with that advancement, one would still have to be in viewing distance of the mood measuring jewelry, which could result in folks’ getting too close to someone whose mood ring is displaying a deep and lovely shade of black.

I think the folks who spend a lot of time with someone who may be subject to regular mood variance really do need a seven day forecast.  A ring just wouldn’t do the trick when you are in a confined space with someone who is crabby and moving toward toxic.  You need a seasoned professional to give you accurate information in advance to best plan.  I bet folks would pay big bucks for such forecasts.  Even if the forecasts were not always 100% accurate, the value of fairly accurate predictions would be evidenced in less arguments and injuries (mental and physical). 

This is what the future looks like my friends.  I know what you are thinking – you are thinking I am a visionary.  Tis’ true, I have a knack for finding solutions to these type of problems; and whatsmore, I can see close-up the color of my mood ring and it tells me that I am slightly crabby.  Could you already tell that?  Well then, I see a future for you as a mood forcaster. 😉

Day eight hundred and forty-two of the new forty – obla di obla da

Ms. C

3 Responses

  1. Stan

    “My husband gave me a mood ring for Christmas.

    When I’m in a good mood it turns green.

    When I’m in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead.”

    I have the marks to prove it.

  2. Kevin

    ya add working 84 hours a week…ya I admit I was grumpy the last few weeks..finally after amonth of of those hours and a day off……no longer grumpy, just to tired to get grumpy…try training two guys with long hours….poor guys….

Comments are closed.