A brown Christmas and spring-like temperatures – what in the world is going on here? Somehow, the Fargo area seems to be sitting in a relative weather bubble – and folks are enjoying (or lamenting – depending on who you are) weather that is very un-Fargo like for this time of year. The risk of a spring flood is very low thus far (only 11% last I heard) and the area snow plow drivers have been getting full nights of sleep…are we in an alternate universe?
I know the whole situation is terribly puzzling. I want you to know that I have been trying to use my incredible powers of deduction, coupled with the data available, to unlock this mystery. After considerable sleuthing I have arrived at what I believe is at the crux of this current pattern of seemingly odd weather patterns…and yes, I am going to share it with you now. Here it is – this year I purchased a snow blower…my first…all bright and shiny…and I have a man around who actually enjoys the activity of snow blowing…hence, the universe is mocking me by providing a snowless existence. All the other years I have lived here in West Fargo my salvation from many feet of snow has been a function of the kindness of neighbors and family members who have taken pity on my woefully unequipped self. Yet this year, the year I have the right equipment and the right manpower to address the snow challenges that have been visited upon my home in the past, I get nothing.
Coincidence? I think not.
This is the universe mocking me – giving me the finger for my Johnny-come-lately arrival at the “Hello!!!! You are wintering in Fargo!!” party.
Well, FINE. I get it – the mystery is solved. I’ll just take back the snow blower and the area will get a foot or two of snow next week. Far be it for me to be the reason a proper winter never arrived.
I have taken note of this though and I plan to use the universe’s penchant toward pettiness in more creative ways in the future. I will be stockpiling mosquito netting, DEET products, zappers, sprayers, etc. like a madwoman in the spring. I’ll spend hundreds of dollars in advance in prepartaion for the onslaught of mosquito season – I’ll be ready in a way that I have never been in the past. What do you think of that universe??!! What are you going to do? Will you mock me by having a mosquito free summer? WHATEVER! Do what ya’ gotta’ do…I’ve got this mystery figured out.
Day nine hundred and three of the new forty – obla di obla da