I was walking about the Atlanta Airport yesterday and it hit me that there should be airport Olympic games. There are some seriously gifted athletes performing at Olympic standards in airports around the world every single day without a lick of recognition. It is time to honor these folks’ prowess in a proper competition that allows for the best to be recognized.
I have already identified three key events for the first Airport Olympics event. all of these events must be conducted in large airports at peak times (places like the Atlanta Airport).
1. Obstacle speed walking and maneuvering.
Participants in this event must be pulling a carry-on behind them and must traverse at least three moving walkways and two escalators across three full terminals. They must also participate in two cell phone calls of two minutes or longer. The participants will be scored on time and technique. Deductions will occur if participants do not complete the mandatory elements and if they injure others.
2. Obstacle running and manuevering.
This is the same as the walking version, however participants must run the entirety of the course.
3. Hospitality cart speed trials.
Participants in this event have to manuever the same course as the walkers and runners (minus the moving walkways and escalators) with a hospitality cart that seats at least four people. Participants must carry at least two passengers. Deductions will occur if passengers fall off or injuries occur.
If you have seen folks practicing these events in airports you know that there is real skill involved in successful execution. There are many unknowns in the course – congestion, airport patrons that make sudden stops, spills, etc. A mistake in judgment could result in casualties.
I can completely envision this. I can also envision it collecting a healthy base of fans. There are succesful television shows about competitive coupon shopping, bartering, and crafting…airport sports trump all of these and a dozen other similar shows that have legions of faithful followers.
Remember – Airport Olympics – you heard it here first.
Day one thousand one hundred and thirty-four of the new forty – obla di obla da