If you have not heard yet, a 78-year-old Mississippi man who was pronounced dead on Wednesday woke up to find himself in a body bag at the funeral home. It is a good thing he woke up when he did as the funeral home was preparing to embalm him. Can you imagine?? The good news is you aren’t dead, the bad news is you are in a body bag.
I am pretty sure that no one wants to visit a body bag before their time. That is just creepy. No offense to funeral home employees, but I don’t think too many folks want to hang out there in the back unless they have to.
It is great that Walter Williams is still alive and kicking. Especially since he was just a hop, skip, and a jump from being embalmed. I am pretty sure that embalming is a day ruiner.
These kinds of stories freak me out. I wonder if there have been others who were not dead and were not as lucky as Walter. This is a prime plot for a scary movie. Indeed, this is ripe fodder for my subconscious to work into my nighttime dreams. I can already predict that this will come up.
I think I should never go anywhere without a pocketknife on me. That way I will be ready to cut open the body bag should they try and take me too soon. Being declared dead and being carted away by the coroner is not something I would be inclined to take lying down. And oh the blue streak I would cuss when I freed myself from the bag. The folks who witnessed it would probably conclude that they were dealing with a demonic possession instead of a premature bagging.
Oh my, I do not want that to ever happen to me. I fairly sure that coroners and the folks at the funeral home are of the same mind – they want the folks they are dealing with in the body bags to be dead. No doubt Walter Williams thrashing about gave the funeral home folks quite a fright. That is one story they’ll be telling for a long awhile. It is also a story I will long remember and one that will provide an explanation for why I started carrying a pocketknife everywhere with me.
Day one thousand three hundred and thirty-three of the new forty – obla di obla da